What Does Grief Require?

Grief does not have the last word.  

This beautiful woman, Miranda Harris was a spiritual momma to me. She helped instill genuine hope by speaking truth in love. She’s a reason I am who I am today - passionate about helping others flourish, like Miranda helped me. 

She was killed tragically 1 year ago. As the car she was in drove off a bridge so did a part of my heart. The ache of her loss stings. 

She was ripped away from earth too soon and just days before the anniversary of my first husband’s death, who also died in a car accident. 

Grief is not convenient. It shows no partiality.

But we can’t ignore it either, it always finds you and rears its ugly head. I’ve learned it’s much better to face it head on.

This picture of us is from a few weeks before she died, our last time together + words penned from her last letter to me, that arrived after she breathed her last. 

It sits on my dresser. Many days it’s hard to see. But instead of rushing past it, I notice my emotions and pause. 

Because…

Grief takes time. Grief takes being present. Grief takes choosing to feel every emotion. 

Grief requires your heart. You can’t disengage and grieve at the same time. 

We all have aches. No one is immune. We’ve all known grief. 

Everyone’s story, pain and loss are different. It ALL matters. 

Heart health requires knowing how to grieve. 

It’s not complicated. You simply must not avoid it, don’t run from it and most importantly don’t numb it. Feel it.

Today requires an extra pause to sit in the emotions, to remember Miranda. To feel gratitude for her life and sadness for the loss, two very contrasting emotions. 

Today, I linger beside her picture, singing the song I wrote for her. 

I remember that life is fleeting and the story is not over. In so many ways it’s just beginning. 

I choose to press on with HOPE for the time that is to come when all will be made right. 

This is not the end. For a moment death might seem to have won. But it does NOT have the victory or the last word!